The Bell Tower

"If government were a toaster, I'd demand a refund"
Apr
15

We're Not Amused

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Squawk! "Nonpartisan congressional budget analysts say the law is fully paid for. Its mix of Medicare cuts and tax increases, falling mainly on upper-income earners, would actually reduce the federal deficit. And people covered by large employers may even see a dip in their premiums." Another AP article that sounds like it was written by Nancy Pelosi's staff. By "nonpartisan congressional budget ... [More]


Apr
12

Opportunism

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For the love of God “Peanuts may not be reasonably necessary for air travel, but the ability to carry a bag onto a flight is,” Schumer wrote, warning he would act if Treasury does not find a remedy “in the coming months.” You may find this surprising but Schumer is up for re-election in 2010. Imagine that. It’s always the same story with this guy. Belligerent, flam... [More]


Apr
11

Devastating News

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I regret to inform my readers that something terrible happened yesterday. Tiger Woods cursed on the golf course. Clearly this means he’s not sorry for cheating on his wife. Sorry to let everyone down with this horrible news. Please continue to watch this space for more gripping updates.


Apr
06

Bias

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Grotesque “Proponents of reducing immigration believe that allowing illegal immigrants access to health care is an incentive for them to come, and an unfair tax burden on Americans.” That is a blatant mischaracterization. Only whackos and nut jobs are for “reducing immigration.” Immigration is a cornerstone of America’s greatness and it should by all means continue ... [More]


Mar
31

Arne Duncan

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To quickly expand on the previous post, permit me an analogy to illustrate the absurdity of Arne Duncan’s education program: A rich man walks into a homeless shelter with a 20 pound turkey and announces that the homeless person who performs the most amusing trick will be awarded the turkey. The states are so strapped for cash right now, they will do just about anything to make a buck. Ent... [More]


Mar
31

Race to the Bottom

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Unsightly “‘We received many strong proposals from states all across America, but two applications stood out above all others: Delaware and Tennessee,’ Duncan said in announcing the winners. ‘Both states have statewide buy-in for comprehensive plans to reform their schools. They have written new laws to support their policies. And they have demonstrated the courage, capacit... [More]


Mar
28

Get a Job

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My Body My Campus “It showed we are ready to stop at nothing to get justice”, said student Julia Shindel. So this is what students call justice in the modern age. Instead of sitting around watching Aqua Teen Hunger Force and drinking their bong water all day, they actually have to get in the car and drive across the street to buy rubbers before they sleep with their over-fed girlfriends. The hor... [More]


Baby Killers! Let’s take these absurdities down one by one: “It was an impressive turnout for a quickly organized protest—but coverage of the event soon was dominated by reports that some demonstrators had hurled racial and homophobic epithets at Democratic lawmakers as they entered the Capitol.” Hmmm… Random radicals – ever present at any protest – shout raci... [More]


Mar
22

The Ides of March

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The Ides fall a week late this year. Julius Caesar’s death marked the end of the Roman Republic. The massive economic power grab that yesterday’s health care vote represents may well herald the death of another. So perhaps the labels cavalierly assigned to this vote – landmark, historic, momentous, seminal – are ironically appropriate. Just as the Roman Senators believed... [More]


Deficit of Trust